The dog days are upon us, and you know what that means: ice cream socials, bbq, and best of all, eating contests! Why not celebrate this last month of sun and surf with a writing challenge: all your faves beating the heat with an end of summer eating contest!
Summer Chubbin’ Challenge 2k15: The (Hot) Dog Days of Summer
Between August 1 and August 30, write your fave character(s) participating in a summer-themed eating competition. (Can be formal or informal - a hot dog contest at a fair? Or two friends betting who can take down a watermelon? Possibilities are endless!)
Post your fic with the tag “summerchubbin” for everyone to read (or submit it anonymously to “thickthighsmaketheworldgoround” if you’re shy!)
August 31: A masterpost linking to all fics will be posted for everyone to enjoy
Setting up my automated romance spreadsheet to keep the pups entertained while I’m gone.
No. No, you can’t just use a phrase like “automated romance spreadsheet” and not explain. I mean, it sounds like a place where robots fuck on a picnic for cryin’ out loud. You’ve gotta fill in the gaps a little more on this one, bub!
Automated Romance, or how robots fuck on a picnic
Minutes before my first-ever sexual encounter, I wrote a Dead Man’s Switch; a simple program that would send a message to my emergency contacts should I fail to deactivate it in 24-hours…you know, in case I died having sex. My previous sexual experiences had not prepared me for actual sex, so I was convinced I would probably be raped, murdered, and my violated body disposed of discretely. (Thanks, public school sexual education).
I’ve kept the program running on a couple redundant servers for the last 11-years, making small updates as I thought up new features for when I die. This program was acting on my behalf…it could do so much more than forward my digital will or release those incriminating NSA documents.
I wrote a complex series of automated actions that would run over several years. My physical life might have ended, but I would continue to surprise and delight the people important to me. (And troll the noodlesandbeef haters).
When I had finished recording the videos for all shark-related end of life scenarios, I realized my obsession with mortality might be misplaced…I could be using this automation right now!
With a couple modifications, I could schedule all sorts of romantic gestures to automatically execute in my absence. This is especially useful when I’m traveling and don’t have internet access.
- so for the first time ever I ended up on the other side of the camera and its invigorating honestly! the rush of someone capturing a moment of my existence and seeing my stretch marks is actually very exciting! to see the beauty of skin is amazing. I know larger people aren’t always seen as beautiful but to me anyone who uses their ability to love and give to people is beautiful! I have been told a lot recently that I inspire people and to think that just being confident and not allowing stereotypes to affect my happiness makes me inspiring is insane… thank you everyone for your love, thank you to everyone who supports my love of my body, and most importantly thank you to anyone who allows me to inspire them; I am truly honored ☺️
- be nice to people, make someone smile today, and love yourself 💕
Did you know you can buy those cakes at the grocery store without it being your birthday or any celebratory thing? Like you can just walk in and grab a cake and buy it and nobody’s gonna say anything. You can even walk in and get like one of those little kid batman themed cakes (or character of your choice depending on availability) and everyone there is just gonna assume that it’s totally for some small child in your life and meanwhile you get a batman cake all to yourself. Yeah, it’s not gonna be a super fantastic cake since it’s just from the grocery store, but that’s not the point. The point is cake. Cake.
In case you missed it yesterday, here’s that sexy lobster print I got, this time not draped across my lap in a car. I still can’t get over it. It’s a reproduction (i knew that the instant I picked it up because it didn’t crumble to pieces) and has water damage, but it was a dollar and is a Victorian print of a woman who clearly just had sex with a lobster, so I don’t care. I can’t seem to find any info on the image.
Artist Riikka Hyvönen from Lapland in Finland,
has spent the last year collecting photographs of roller derby girls’
bottoms and converting the athletic injuries and bruises – which she
calls ‘kisses’ – in giant pop artworks, some of which currently make up
part of an exhibition at the Finnish institute in King Cross, London.
Saint Jude Thaddeus, thank you for the happiness you gave me—for The Cheeky. Every day on my way to the bakery, I saw a guy who stared at me. I always looked away and ignored him but one day I noticed that he was following me. Another day he slapped my ass. I felt embarrassed and became very nervous. That’s how I met Sotero and we became a couple.
Marina Abramović: The Artist Is Present March 14 - May 31, 2010 at the MoMA. Portraits by Marco Anelli.
I believe so much in the power of performance I don’t want to convince people. I want them to experience it and come away convinced on their own.
do you guys want to hear something sad? i love marina abramovic, and i went to see her retrospective at moma, and i stood in the same room as her and watched people sit down with her, and it wasn’t THAT crowded, i could’ve had a turn, but i didn’t do it because they were photographing everyone and i didn’t want a picture of me, a fat person, online for people to mock.
i’ve done a complete 180 since then (like, there are NAKED pictures of me on the internet and i have not felt even a moment of self-doubt or felt ‘ugly’ or whatever in over 4 years), but i will never get the opportunity to participate in ‘the artist is present’ back, and i hate fatphobia for making me miss out on so much of life. never again !